BY AMBER RACH: Special to The Pilot

Gene Cheek’s odyssey through North Carolina’s racial past produced one of the most heart-rending stories of our time. It is a story of racism, a mother’s love and a boy’s forced exile from his family.

Cheek discussed his book, “The Color of Love: A Mother’s Choice in the Jim Crow South,” on Feb. 7, at The University of North Carolina at Pembroke. He was the guest of the Friends of Sampson-Livermore Library and the Multicultural Center for two discussions.

A 1963 court order from a Winston-Salem judge removed Cheek, at age 12, from his mother. A textile worker, his mother had left an abusive and alcoholic husband and befriended an African-American man, which was illegal in the Jim Crow South. The court offered his mother a choice between Cheek and her infant biracial son.

The author, who grew up at the Boys Home in nearby Lake Waccamaw, said “the choice” paralyzed his mother. A 12-year-old boy made the decision for her.

“At age 12, I knew I could not let my mother make that choice. How could she and live?” Cheek said. “If you could send a letter to God and ask him to send you a mother, he would send my mother.”

Calling himself the most “unlikely author that will ever stand before you,” Cheek offered a number of observations from his life of banishment and eventual reunion with his mother. An audience of about 60 listened during the afternoon session in the James B. Chavis University Center.

Love, he said, is “fated,” but it conquers all, even racism.

“We loved each other right on,” Cheek said of his biracial family. “I had to wait until she was gone to write this book.”

Forgiveness, he said, is not about the forgiven.

“On my father’s deathbed, I asked him if he had anything to say to me,” Cheek said. “He didn’t.”

“I forgave him,” Cheek said. “I had to forgive him to live. It was not for him. It was for me. Hate will kill you.”

Cheek knows about anger, too.

“I have resentment and anger. More than you’ll ever know,” he said. “Am I better now? It’s a work in progress.”

Racism, he said, is alive and well in America, but there has been progress.

“This University is the most diverse in the UNC system. That’s good. That’s something to build on,” Cheek said. “Unless we get to know one another, we’ll never get over this.”

“Judge people by their character, not their skin,” he said. “Don’t look at the differences. Look at the similarities. Stand up for what’s right.”

Of his legacy, the author said it is surprising. In researching his book, he learned that the social worker in his case quit her job after the trial, and the state’s attorney was devastated by the case.

“Never doubt the legacy you leave behind,” Cheek said. “If you see a bum on the street and if you have a dollar, give it to him. Your actions do matter. You don’t have to like people, but don’t go out of your way to negatively affect them.”

Cheek said the book is part of the healing process that continues, just as racism continues.

“My ‘finer nature’ was destroyed that day. I didn’t get over it,” Cheek said. “Part of the reason I do this is to give you pause.”